Today is Jimmy Carter's birthday! (I knew you'd all want to know that.) Here's a birthday suggestion for the Former President:
Save up all that hot air you're so famous for and use it to blow out your candles! Maybe Hugo and Fidel can help you out. Better guard your cake from Michael Moore.
FYI: I believe that you were the worst president in my lifetime and I hated Nixon. You do the math. (Does that make me a racist towards silly southern peanut farmers?)