Just when I think it's safe to go back into the kitchen, the little terrorists return. They invaded the one thing I really cared about this morning: my cereal. A brand new box! Of course, they weren't happy with just that- No, they sent another battalion to breach everything except the canned food. They're wily little things. They're probably working on weapons that will penetrate cans.
I can be a bit cranky when I'm hungry, plus I hadn't even had my coffee! I can only describe my reaction this morning as totally berserk. The ants ran when they saw my index finger poised to smash their little black butts. You'd better run, you little #$!%&#*. I confess that my language was less than lady-like. I have repented. I'll probably have to repent a thousand times more before noon.
These are obviously an Al-qANT cell or perhaps TalibANTS. Whoever they are, they are the enemy! This is all-out war. No more Ms. Nice Guy. Somebody is gonna die and it ain't gonna be me!
Does anyone have the telephone number for the U.S. Marines?