Thursday, May 8, 2008

Oh Hillary! Please Don't Go!

The pundits are encouraging Hillary to give up her big dream of absolute power. I want her to stay in the race even if her loss is inevitable.
Why, you ask, would I, a card-carrying conservative want her to continue? I'll tell you why:
I have the entire summer's entertainment planned around the Democrat's knock-down, drag-out convention.
Sure, I know normal people don't find that stuff interesting, but I've never claimed to be normal. I want to see Hillary bitch-slap Bill Richardson while steam blows out of the former president's ears and he turns the color of Barney the Dinosaur. I'd enjoy seeing James Carville in a knife fight with Howard Dean. I imagine armed guards pulling Hillary from the convention while she screams, "You OWE me!" It won't be pretty but it will be entertaining.
It'll make the 1968 debacle of 'The whole world is watching' look like tea-time at Wimbledon.

I enjoy roll-call where states announce their claim to fame:
The great state of Mississippi, who kicks Alabama's ass in football, declares all their votes for (insert candidate name).

Georgia- the state that made the peanut famous and produced Jimmy Carter, the worst president and now former president in the history of the world casts all their votes for (I.C.N.)

The mellow state of California, where marijuana is legal but prayer is not, where we are so far left of center we've fallen off the damn planet casts some votes for (I.C.N.) and the rest we can't remember.
Anyway, maybe it's just me, but I'm looking forward to the madness.

3 comments:

Don the Baptist said...

Maureen Down referred to Hillary's fight as a Shermanesque march to Denver. I like that.

Kathleen Flynn said...

I rarely agree with Maureen Dowd- but I'd have to on that. I'm also thinking it could be a bit Custer's Last Stand-ish.

Don the Baptist said...

Hunner' percent!